Freedom in a stereotype

Today I was a stereotype. in a good way that made me laugh. When I got dressed today I had to wear a dress since I needed to do laundry and my "regular" clothes we all dirty. So, I chose a dress that I know my husband likes. Its a bit form fitting and the girls show more than they usually do, although it is very comfortable.

I am pregnant and I never wear shoes at home, I hate them. So, there I was in my sexy dress, barefoot and pregnant while doing housework. It made me laugh when I realized it. It felt good to fit into one of the stereotypes for a day. My husband loved it and I got a bit more affection than normal. It was a winning situation for both of us.

I think as women we are afraid to put ourselves out there like that sometimes. Even for our husbands. What is it we are afraid of? A neighbor seeing us? Who cares if they do, its your business what you do in your house, not theirs. Are we afraid of looking too good and making our husbands expect it all the time? I doubt he would but what's wrong with looking good for the man you love? Or are we just afraid of coming out of our shell? What would happen if we felt good about how we look all the time or if our husband always enjoyed what he saw?

Maybe we just need to treasure ourselves a bit more and be willing to sex it up a bit now and then. What would happen if every woman suddenly loved herself? If every woman suddenly stopped caring what other women thought and dressed for her and her husband? I think there would be a lot more happy women, happy husbands and as a result a lot happier marriages.

Why are we so afraid to love ourselves? I think it goes back to the heart of my last post. Too many of us are told as children that there is something wrong with being feminine. We are told to cover our breasts even when they are hard to hide like mine are. "Wear a vest with that shirt so your breasts don't stick out too much." Yes, I heard that one. I wore vests throughout much of my teen years trying to hide my Cs. I'm sorry but at 14 its hard to hide the fact that your breasts are size C. Our legs are to be covered above the knee or more just so we don't "Cause a brother to stumble." Too much neck, too much arm, too much, too much!

While I believe that the world we live in far undervalues modesty, I also believe that the church overvalues it. There is nothing wrong with being beautiful, nothing wrong with wanting to look beautiful. I also believe there is nothing wrong with hoping a good guy will notice when you do look good. God created that desire in us and the desire in men to see us. In a healthy way. In a well dressed, not so covered as to be a nun but not so uncovered as to be a hooker, way.

If a man is looking at me in a way the is not appropriate that is his heart issue not mine. It is not up to me to be sure that every man that looks at me isn't sinning. It is, however, up to me to make sure my husband has something enjoyable to look at when we go out. I am preaching to myself here as much as I am to anyone else. I don't dress nice enough much of the time. Because I am afraid to look good. I was taught to hide under clothes not to use them to enhance my natural beauty.

My husband loves me and loves to look. My God made me and made me beautiful to my husband. Why would I hide under clothes that neither one of us like just to keep him from seeing me? Maybe I need to have more stereotype days; more barefoot, pregnant and sexy days. (Minus the pregnant in a few months)

I want to teach my daughters how to dress in a way that enhances their looks, not downplays them but doesn't overplay them either. No hookers in this house but no nuns either.

Who treasures me?

With a blog name like He Treasures Me, people are going to wonder who the "he" is I'm talking about. In this case its twofold. First and foremost I mean God. God my creator and sustainer.

Yes, this is a blog where I will be getting "religious" a lot. But not in the bash you over the head with the Bible God hates you kind of way. More of a, I believe God made me and loves me and wants me to have the best life I can, kind of thing.

Second I mean my husband. He treasures me in a way that I wish every woman could experience. He loves me like crazy even when I am crazy and in his words he, Just wants me to be ok.

But there is one small problem, one I believe every woman out there has. I have a hard time remembering. Remembering how my God and my husband feel about me. I get lost in the pressures our world throws at me and the lies that say only skinny women get love. I forget that I am a perfect creation of God and a woman chosen for life by a wonderful man.

This is the story of my journey to me and my struggles to remember that I am a treasure. I am sharing it because I believe that every woman out there struggles with these same feeling. Our world is very hard on women. We are abused by simply walking out our doors. Every sign with a "perfect" airbrushed, overly made up, too skinny woman on it says we aren't enough. If you don't fit the "perfect profile" you are glared at just for walking through the store and not being perfect.

But, if you are blessed enough to find that man who will treasure you and to remember how much your Creator treasures you; you can ignore those looks and walk proud. I am working on remembering that and I will share my discoveries with you. I am hoping that the inside journey will one day make it to the outside. I'm not happy with what I see in or out. But first I have to fix my heart and get ok with who I am. Then I can fix the outside and make that as beautiful as it was meant to be and as beautiful as I am on the inside.